Tuesday, September 10, 2013

September 10, 2013 A Politically Incorrect Poem

So I was in the butcher shop the other day and both amused and horrified myself with the thought:  I am tired of the same old meat.  Thus the inspiration for this poem/punk song.  With a nod to Jonathan Swift.  To all my vegan/ish friends:  please forgive me this silliness and I hope it does not offend you.  I admire your values greatly in this regard, and find myself woefully lacking, hence the self-mockery.

The Politically Incorrect Paean to Meat

My friends have all gone vegan,
gluten- free, no GMO’s
but I feed my addiction
with those hint of lime Tostitos

They all eat kale and quinoa,
whatever the fuck that is
but me I want some onion rings,  
and gimme gooey cheez whiz

         But the thing that I like best of all is meat, yeah I said it, meat
         The only trouble is there’s just not enough of it to eat
         Flesh from cows and pigs and chickens is all I ever see
         There’s a whole wide world of animals,
         Just waiting for a fricasee

Yeah, I love tritips, breasts and thighs
I like my burgers rare and thick
Can sink my teeth into a pork chop
Enjoy that corn dog on a stick

But I’m tired of the same old thing
I want something new to masticate
An emu, or a leopard
Put a panda on my plate

Let me deep fry up a dingo
Add a lemur to my stew
And on my shishkabob
I’d like a meerkat, maybe two

       Yeah the thing that I like best of all is meat, I said it , meat

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