Summer School (Fireflies) next version...

Here is the same poem from my previous post,  me tightening up the meter/syllable counts per line.   Sometimes I think it is structurally better to have everything evened out, other times I like the ragged edges for the flow of the meaning.

If anyone has an opinion regarding the two versions, would love to hear it!

Summer School

I remember lightning bugs:

first time I saw them,

a golden buzz blinking

in black of the night.

My cousins with a Bell jar,

holes punched in metal

for catching the laggards

and twisting lid tight.

I felt myself mesmerized;

that belly on fire

twinkling, one moment here

then one moment done

Ah, the thrill of the capture!

Delicate creature!

But once I encased it,

I wanted it gone

released to the nighttime sky,

back to the starshine;

because in the glass was

a prison and death.

I ached when I saw her there,

glow slowly fading,

wings searching for freedom,

she struggled for breath.

For here was a lesson learned

early in childhood,

though I had not words for

this wisdom I'd learned:

In the act of possessing

you kill what you love.

In taking the fire of

another, you burn.